Personally, the initial first 10 years of engaged in learning of traditional Buddhism (Therava School) did had some imprints on my perceptions and ideas of what are the practices in the Discipline in the basic needs lay people could offer to the renounced monks: Clothing, Food, Shelter, Transportation (衣，食，住，行).
I thought somehow as our society developed and becoming more globalized, these needs sometimes or most time have to be adjusted to convenient the full-time practitioners. In particular in year 2009, I was committed to offer, assist, help the Tibetan Teachers met at my homeland connected through my late parents. Initially I was delighted to know their background training had been the earliest Tibetan tradition - Nyingmapa, spent decades studying, learning and later teaching in Dzogchen Monastery in Tibet, later India. Later, we were in touch with his brother, Kunde Rinpoche. May be due to some unseen karmic link, I was connected to provide services and offerings to these Tibetan Teachers. My definition of Tibetan Teacher here is 'A trained, learned practitioner from a recognized monastery with a long enough lineage of tradition in a Buddhist college/institute who had spent at least 10-15 years in that monastery environment (may be with some exception in this 'dharma ending age', but definitely to me, Teacher-pupil relations should not be impersonal such as met a 'dharma teacher' online via FB, Skype, videos, webcast ect. and started to show savvy technology skills to network other practitioners existing friends/students to widen one's network / pool of 'disciples' and resulted in some sort of 'disharmony' within the organized lay communities no matter how one is regarded intelligent in self-learning of making synopsis/summary of available vast collection of dharma books) , including practical teaching, rituals, arts and crafts if possible. He may not have affluent vocabularies in our language skills but we could feel his kind-heartedness and compassion, and capable of giving spiritual blessings to humans' psychological needs of countering life, old age, sickness and death (last rite in accordance to Buddhist tradition)!
Personally, I have confident to give offerings to monks/lamas are meaningful generosity practice. Nevertheless, during these nearly 4 years or more, live experiences of serving Lamas from my Teacher, Kunde Rinpoche had opened my other dimension (may be even correct my impure perceptions) of the meanings of serving Buddhist Lamas (Monks). Some snapshots of what had happened narrated here are meant for self-contemplation, this narrations were based on personal experiences, it does not represent the thought, intention or authority from my Teacher(s) - In reflection, it has taken me some inner courage to face these realities rather than being nice and being afraid of reborn in lower realms of sharing these experiences - may these live experiences served as ethical lessons for our motivation in practising generosity:
case 1 - sometime in 2010, while we were trying hard to raise enough funding for the first English publication of Kunde Rinpoche's Dzogchen practice manuscript, A Garland of Flowers, one day the Teacher called me from India and requested me to send the funding money for a Lama whom was studying at Sakya College and was sick with some kind of illness, and needed to travel to China for treatment. Being an analytical person, and may be conditioned to formed fixed perceptions and certain system of delivery in management, I reminded that the available funds was meant for publishing his manuscript which had been delaying for many factors! In a gentle voice, he answered me it did not matter as this Lama needed help for medical treatment - I was rather touched as this person he did not know him in person but via another Lama he knows. Thus the publication funding account was donated instead! May the Lama be Well and Happy!
Case 2: (Disclaimer: this case is narrated here as a lesson for lay people to contemplate our motivation in offering material needs to full-time Buddhist practitioners) - A lay person from another land who had been providing her apartment as lodging for lamas when they visited that country. We had been rejoicing of such meritorious deed. It was not until after year(s) later, we accidentally found out this lay person had 'borrowed' money from my Teacher (and another Teacher) to 'saved' her from legal trouble! To our normal judgement, that was fine as it was based on the compassion of the Teacher(s). But later year her apartment was sold and it was told that she wanted to fulfil her dream of helping someone building a monastery in xx country (instead of returning what had been considered a loan than a 'gift'), an offering to someone whom we did not know but based on the clothing he represented. The strategy of this person was he followed other known practitioner(s) along to that country and expressed his wish, in front of our other connected Buddhist Teacher. As Buddhists, it was regarded such motivation of building a monastery is paramount to preserve the tradition. Later we heard of stories and facts of the episodes (like a live drama on staging?) such as the construction of the intended building had not taken place thus far, the lay person may had hefty debts etc. etc. Ensuing that, the disheartening fact(s) we later accidentally counter-examined and found out the reality - this lay person even 'confiscated' skilfully more than 90% of the sum of cash given to my Teacher's monastery as supports trustfully via herself! The therapy for this lesson: It was really imperative we reflect on the Law of Karma constantly to be free from samsara one day (philosophically)! - The only consolation to ourselves - we had paid back our karmic debts to her? (sounded like the Chinese saying: "Aa Q" spirit?). Nevertheless, one reality we could not avoid if we try to be clever in getting such easy gains - our trust and dignity could be diluted naturally.
Case 3: within this year, a lay 'buddhist' friend from the south grandly offered to my Teacher she could help to raise the funding so that the aspiration to refund the remaining FOC interest loans for Dzogchen Monastery Library construction could be fulfilled. She suggested to do a 'Naga Puja' (and said that later another Buddhist Puja at the neighbouring country via her connections/network) at her house which has a room for a Buddhist shrine. After the date of the Puja had been confirmed, then only she informed that the proceed of the Naga Puja was to assist a Lama from Sakya College who was lodging at her house. Despite all these, my Teacher as a recognized Tulku by many His Holinesses, also a Khenpo (though he has not been using the 'title') who had spent more than a decade learning, practising and teaching in a renowned Monastery from Tibet (Shriseng Monastery) still humbly presided the Puja without any 'negotiation' - it was another form to help a Lama and a simple 'reason' my Teacher had given to my 'rational interrogative style of WH question' was that this young Lama did mention he was going to give to the college (not sure some, little or all proceeds). As a lay student myself who is helping and managing the funding of his project of the building that new library in the monastery who may have more 'impure perceptions' - Based on her verbal words. I would perceive all these may be intelligent way of that lay person to fulfilled her agenda! (may be it is difficult to learn the moral meaning behind the story of 'The Emperor's New Clothes' than to remain silent in hypocrisy). Later when we were in a Buddhist Center preparing for the Naga Puja at the North, we received a sms from her asking Rinpoche to go to the South tomorrow or the day after for a Long-life (Amitayus) Puja at the neighbouring land. As we had an important Puja already arranged and in the midst of preparing the tedious long process treasure vases, I replied on behalf and informed of the situation, and reminded her to give at least 1-2 weeks advanced notice on grand puja in the future! Her replied 'Noted'.
The Buddhist Master, Kunde Rinpoche's compassionate act of non-dualistic way of handling and 'not reacting' or silently 'complying' to the 'demand(s)' of the so called Buddhist student(s) or lay practitioner(s) on all the man-made obstacles had at one point made me lost my mind into some kind of 'delusion' or may be mixed with impure perceptions. I had to regain my balance by contemplating on the subject: 'what did serving a Teacher meant?' - are we doing all these for the sake of ourselves mundane benefits (subconsciously) , OR, aspiring for Enlightenment ultimately? - In relation to also other happenings related to such motives of serving a Buddhist Teacher in organizing Pujas, personally I perceived our communication and behaviour towards a Buddhist Master could be 'arrogant' to make verbal or finally actual offering of helping to organized a Buddhist Puja but did not see to the beginning, middle and end with "decent" ways (though 'decent' could be subjective connotation culturally). In many occasions, I had to ask myself: What was the motivation of assisting or organizing a Buddhist Puja, though the proceed had a surface or higher meaning of contributing to the Monastery's Library shortage funding, but the underlying meaning of a Buddhist Puja - I suppose, intellectually, it is facilitating the spiritual dimension for the benefits of all sentient beings ultimately, though personally we may have many personal wishes for accumulation of merits for ourselves, our loved ones, relatives, etc. etc. - Have we ask ourselves: is our approach and way diluting all the merits accumulated then?
In my reflections as conclusion: In serving Buddhist Teacher(s) and Lamas as well - May be, sometimes, our own lack of confident (insecurity?) may not able to face or swallow some unfounded words or criticism which may sounded like 'suspicious abusing of funding, transparency of accounts' etc. from others, my point was that why bother so much on those words or speculations and finally caused much inconveniences and unhappiness to many concerned, whereas the Master trusted the person as organizer or coordinator who not only spent time, energy, supports, materials gifts and personal uncounted monetary contributions towards the whole processes and considered successfully done???
Finally, may be these 3 principal tenets of Buddhist teachings on motivation could be our guides for reflections here: The Intention (发心)，Bodhicitta (菩提心)，Spiritual Faith (虔诚心).
before exit, after all the babblings, here I would like to share some pictures of beautiful rainbow of the nature that was revitalizing for me after months of voluntarily dharma works and services to the Lama(s), with much unknown impure perceptions like it or not - luckily not ended in psychosis state (?) :)-D)
- photographed by sonam yeshi on 4 June 2013:
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[pic 2]
[pic 3]
Tashi Delek
